Hard day

It's not been a hard day all day, I've had moments of laughter, fun and joy. This evening we went to church and once again God had been filling the Pastor in on all my failings so he could cut to the quick and give me another humbling learning experience..God is good that way :0) Loves us enough to only let us rest on our laurels briefly before He continues His honing of us!

But all day I have felt like a cat on a hot tin roof. We got two forms back saying our paper work had been sent to the Haitian Embassy for processing. This means that once we get the passports and the boys have had their physicals we can go get visas for them and bring them home!! YET we don't have passports or even the adoption decree yet..so.....

And I have been missing Jesley so much today!!! The grief doesn't seem to be getting any easier and the closer the boys come to being home the big the Jesley gap is. I rejoice so in the boys, my sons, who will be coming home with us but I am mourning my Jesley..my Noah and strangely I'm mourning the loss of my twins as well. Can't really put my finger on it but it is part of this journey and so here it is...

So thankful the last two hurricanes have skirted Haiti. Being here and having the boys there has my Mummy heart wanting to jump on a plane and fly INTO the storms not away from them, I want my arms around them if danger is coming.. thankfully God loves them infinitely more than I do, but still.

My twins

So thankful I got the brief time I did with them and I know joy will come in the morning once my sons are home. I have such a great deal to look forward to.